Surviving the Nicaraguan Glee Club, Vol. 4

It'sssssssssss Saturday! Meaning I am later than ever with Surviving Glee Club. I found out that at least one of my dear friends does, in fact, read this, so I shall continue on. We'll get the ball rolling ASAP with the fourth epside of season 2 of Glee.

***

Glee!

Earlier on Tuesday, my good friend Kyle and I got together, and got to discuss Glee for a bit, which was great, and got me pretty amped for the night's episode. This was the first week I hadn't seen a preview for what was going down, so it was all a surprise. Basically, it was an episode for everyone to pair off and do duets. For some reason Puck, was sent to juvie, for crashing in to an ATM with his mother's car...? I don't know why they decided that was a way to go with the plot, but whatever. So, TNKWHSOBVRSE1 (as mentioned in my last recap), is now part of Glee club. Kurt thinks he's gay and insists he "duet" (anyone else thinking of the "Let's Duet" song from Walk Hard? lolololol) with him, but everyone keeps telling TNKWHSOBVRSE1 (hereforeafter known as "Sam", since that's his name) that it'd basically be social suicide for him. Sure enough, he gets slushied, and that leads to him having a moment with Quinn, and making really awkward Avatar references. Moving right along.

SANTANA AND BRITTANY WERE MAKING OUT?? I found this highly amusing, and I can only imagine what all the censors and parents were thinking. Having fucking aneurisms over it, I guarantee. I won't get in to that though; I plan to do one of my regular posts about censorship, the FCC, and sheltering your kids. I lol'd a lot at that. Santana decides to duet with Mercedes, Rachel and Finn obvs are partners, Tina and Mike (though Tina wanted to duet with Artie), and Britt approaches Artie and tells him she wants to bone him, basically, and they should be partners. Kurt's Dad (HE LIVES) tells Kurt it isn't fair to force Sam to duet with him, so Kurt does a song himself - something from Victor Victoria that I didn't know. I didn't know Santana/Mercedes' pick, either. Tina and Mike are apparently having problems, and Mike suggested they go to "Asian couple's therapy", to which Tina replied, "WHY DOES EVERYTHING HAVE TO BE ASIAN?" which was another LOL moment. Brittany ends up taking Artie's virginity, which was a sin, because as liberal and forward as I am, I am very, very moral when it comes to monogamy and sex and virginity being a BFD that shouldn't be taken lightly. Artie was super upset about it, and decided not to duet with Brittany. So nothing from Britt and Artie, which sucks - Artie's voice is my favorite of all the Glee clubbers.

Rachel and Finn  practiced "Don't Go Breakin' My Heart", which was AWESOME! One of my favorite songs, I actually have 3 versions of it on my iPod. Rachel then gets all deep (for about half a second), and says that she only ever wants something good for others if it benefits her. It was a good moment, because I think the vast majority of us are like that, whether we realize it or not. So she decides that she wants Sam to feel welcome in Glee, and therefore he has to win the duet competition. Finn points out that this is still selfish; she only wants him to stick around so they have a shot at Nationals. And she admits it, and that's fine. So Sam needs to duet with Quinn. He convinces her, but then tries to kiss her, which freaks her the fuck out.

Sidenote: Quinn is everything I hate, but at the same time I can't help but admite her, and I really, really like her character.

Rachel and Finn convince them to give the duet another go. OH! The prize for whoever wins? FREE DINNER AT BREADSTICKS, which is apparently a restaurant that gives you unlimited breadsticks. It made me weak how obsessed everyone was with winning. Mike and Tina did a really weird... song... thing? That baffled me. It was entertaining, however. Rachel and Finn did some song (seriously, aside from Don't Go Breakin' My Heart, song-wise, this ep was a huge fail for me) and dressed religiously, and apparently it was super-offensive. I was not offended, I did not understand. So that left Sam and Quinn to do this super-cute little song, which I'll have to look up and download. About being "Lucky I'm in love with my best friend", and since I am, I am a sucker for songs of that nature. So they won the duet competition, went to breadsticks, and decided to make it a date. So apparently Sam's not gay.

Rachel has a chat with Kurt and they do a duet to some Barbara Streisand song - yes, I know, I am the absolute worst reviewer ever, and the biggest showtune fail ever. I'll look up the titles in 2.2, promise. And all is well? Sure.

I just wonder what happened to Puck....

Songlist:

Mecerdes and Santana - River Deep and Mountain High

Kurt - Le Jazz Hot

Mike/Tina - Sing!

Rachel/Finn - With You I'm Born Again

Sam/Quinn - Lucky - Colibie Callait and Jason Mraz!?!?!?! No wonder I loved it! Bubbly and I'm Yours are too of my favorite I am so happy and in love : ) songs!

Rachel/Jurt - Happy Days are Here Again

ALSO!  SOON WE'LL HAVE THE ROCKY HORROR GLEE SHOW!!!!!!!!!! WHICH IS THE GREATEST THING I HAVE EVER HEARD IN MY LIFE AND IT IS GOING TO BE EPICEPICEPIC.

*cough. I'll calm down now.*

Survivor: Nicaragua, Episode 5


As usual, as of the end of last week's episode, this was who was there and gone:

If this were an episode of Friends, it'd be called "The One Where Shit Hit the Fan". Or, "The One Where Everything Changed", although that's not as dramatic. Basically, it was one of those days, where the producers got bored and said, "Fuck it, let's switch tribes".

So, the old and the young headed out to a challenge, only to be told to "drop their buffs".  Which sounds a lot filthier than it actually is. Marty had just been shown at Espada, being all proud to finally be in charge. I'm thinking the decision was made to shake things up when the producers realized the older tribe were failing reeeeeally hard at challenges, and the tribes would soon be obscenely uneven. Anyway, Brenda (Asian) was a "team captain" for LaFlor [youngdumbfucks] and Holly was Espada's captain [oldoldold] - FYI, I dislike Holly. I am totally Team Jane, which I suspected I would be from day 1. Brenda got to pick 3 old folks to be on LaFlor, and Holly got to pick 4 youngins for Espada.

And the new tribes are as follooooows:

*NEW* La Flor: Brenda chose Jane, Jill, and Marty. So LaFlor is now Brenda, 2 Kellys, Jud (FABIOOO), Sash, Jane, Jill and Marty.

*NEW* Espada: Holly picked Alina, Benry, Chase, and Naonka. Making Espada Holly, Tyrone, Dan , Yve, and Alina/Benry/Chase/Naonka.

So, my hastily thrown-together infographic:

It was kind of awesome, because this season was so painfully boring. Alina and Kelly B - alliance split. Naonka was taken from her alliance as well, and forced to be with her enemy, Alina. Marty lost his power as soon as he had it, Jane is happyhappy because she gets along better with the youngins, Holly said the same as far as her tribe went. Tyrone decided he was the leader of Espada now (and I quickly quit Team Tyrone, cause it was awful - more on that later), and Naonka just fucking fell apart.. BECAUSE IT WAS RAINING. I live on a fucking island, and it sure as hell ain't tropical, a little weather never hurt anyone. Also, it was revealed she's like, 27, 28? I thought she was much younger, considering how immature she is. But I digress.

Before we found out Naonka can't deal with water (is she Elphaba, the Wicked Witch of the West? Will she melt?), there was a reward challenge, which NEWEspada won. They got 2 chickens and one rooster. Back at camp for the first time, Tyrone emerged as (a really awful) leader. The old folks apparently had lots of rules and order to how they did things, which didn't sit well with the kiddies, as they'd had none.

Back at NEWLaFlor, Marty was rambling about how they'd all had jobs but he didn't want to step on any toes or anything, so he'd go by however LaFlor had done it to begin with. Brenda was just like, "We're chill..." And Jane was excited to be on a "chill" tribe.

Tyrone, meanwhile, was driving the youngins INSANE over at Espada. Holly felt she could relate to the kids much better, and quickly aligned herself with them - so they had the numbers, instantly. Alina was fake-nice to Naonka, but really couldn't wait for her to go home. Naonka almost quit.  Tyrone fought everyone's decision to kill one of the chickens right away, stood back and watched them cook it, didn't help, but then ate the most. This didn't sit well with the tribe, and it pissed me off, too. I had been hardcore team Tyrone, and there he was, losing it already.

They had an immunity challenge that was actually kind of cool; it involved some of the girls being attached to a giant wheel and getting dunked head-first in to water. They had to get as much water in their mouths as possible, and fill up a meter. In the end, despite shaking up the tribes, LaFlor once again wins immunity!


Tribal Council wasn't as interesting as in the past. One thing worth noting, is that Jeff kept asking the castaways questions, and they were giving vague answers and Jeff was more or less snapping at them, which was HILARIOUS. It was like he wasn't putting up with any BS from them. There was discussion on how Naonka was basically giving up and was getting ready to go home, and how Tyrone was now the leader.

Not that it mattered, because...

Tyrone was the 5th person voted out of Survivor: Nicaragua.

I was shocked! He went from being my favorite to INSANELY IRRITATING in one episode, from being one of the strongest links to the most hated. And that, my friends, is how you shake up a game!